ConTroll

CON-TROLL, each of us have dealt with it. Don’t let IT get the best of  you.

He who angers you, controls you! In fact, anyone that you allow to evoke an emotional response from you, controls you! Yeah, yeah, yeah, you intellectually know this, but emotionally you are in a stir. And, you want to know how to disengage the negative emotions. How can you address or prevent others from upsetting your balance and evoking the negative energy in you? Great question.

First, you can consider the source. Seriously look at the person who is basically talking at you because he or she are not respecting you enough to engage in a conversation. They are either looking for a reaction, or, they are passing the buck. They are venting on you, all the pent-up negative energy they had absorbed from their experiences throughout the day or longer. Who are you allowing to anger you or trigger an emotional reaction or response from you? Who is this person, really? Is that person a supervisor, a peer, a co-worker, a family member or a friend? When possible, write down absolutely everything that this person has done to upset you on a scrap piece of paper. And then release that energy by setting that scrap paper aside for at least an hour. 

Second, consider the relationship you have with this person. This is the transformational part of handling the negative emotions to create the shift of control back into your hands. How much time and/or feelings have you invested with the person who is upsetting your balance? What is your vested interest in the relationship? What is it worth to you to maintain this relationship? After you have had some to reflect on these questions, go back and revisit that paper you set aside earlier. See what you can do to transform each statement into something positive about this person. Consider how this person has affected  your life in a positive way. What qualities does this person have that you appreciate? If you look hard enough you can find at least one thing, even if he or she is simply a catalyst on your transformation to becoming more resilient. 

Think about this statement: It takes less effort to pull someone down than to pull someone up. So, how can you strengthen your resolve? How about bringing others up to your level instead of allowing them to pull you down to their energy level. In that very moment when you are engaged in a situation, where you could potentially be brought into the negative energy, can you step outside yourself and the situation such that you can gain a new perspective? Can you see the bigger picture? Is it possible to rephrase your antagonist’s words into something positive? Believe it or not, you do have a choice to either give into negative emotions or positive ones.

There are many questions you can always ask yourself such as: What is the lesson in all of this? What is the positive side in this situation? Where is the opportunity in this situation? How can I bless it and move back to a place of equilibrium? What can I laugh about this situation in my life? And, who gets to control my emotions, me or others? You picked the former, right? Of course you did, because you know that you get to choose how you want to feel. Don’t let others take away your joy. Instead, be the joy for others. Be in control (of the Con-Troll).

Related articles

• Balance (akissofbliss.wordpress.com)
• What Are Emotional Triggers? (1personresponsible.com)
• Shift Your Focus on Something that Best Works for You!! (bucketlistchallenges.com)
• Equanimity: Calmness in the midst of Chaos (drschiffman.wordpress.com)
• Optimism And Healing (springwolf.net)
• Transitions (akissofbliss.wordpress.com)
• Confession booth (ta7ssel.wordpress.com)
• Really, Am I Responsible For My Emotions? (r2blog.com)
• Seeing is the gift (greatitudes.com)

Clarity

What is clarity? Freedom from ambiguity and indistinctness and the state of being clear, transparent or open define clarity. Clarity is a state of certainty and purity most people seek when defining themselves, their purpose and their intentions. When one’s intentions are pure and open then one can manifest his or her desires.

Clear thought, pure intentions and defined dreams are needed in order for manifestation to happen. Trust is built when people state exactly what they want and they are sincere and open with their  intentions. Amicable interpersonal relationships are created. One is compelled to support someone he or she can trust. This support may come in many forms: love, compassion, social or financial.

Think of one’s intentions as being a door, if the door is closed or ambiguous how does one invite support. It is only when one’s door is open and distinct that he or she can welcome support. People cannot support another if his or her door is closed, ambiguous or undefined, can they? At best there will be a sense of suspicion. When one has clarity in his or her purpose, dreams and intentions, then others can support his or her dreams and desires. Consider clarity when defining yourself, your purpose and your intentions and see what manifests. 

Related articles

• clarity (zendictive.wordpress.com)
• Simplicity (akissofbliss.wordpress.com)
• Clarity (hannahfayefisher.wordpress.com)