Simply BLiss-behaving

BLISS-behaving is a term I coined to describe how I enjoy behaving…BLISSFULLY!!! It is fun to BLISS-behave as you are spreading your bliss everywhere you go. It is a positive way to be!

I indulge in happiness and bliss whenever I can even when I may start out feeling blah for whatever reason (the weather or an ailment). As soon as I engage in bliss-behaving, I begin to feel more energetic and joyful. One of my favorite things to do to bliss-behave is to play my favorite music, which is usually upbeat and energetic. Then any activity I do becomes play instead of work or a chore.

Bliss-behaving also describes what I do when I engage others in positive experiences like paying one a compliment, holding open a door, sharing a Gift of Love or simply a smile. It is playful and positive action where love and kindness are spread. And, the more I bliss-behave the more joyful I feel!

What does simply BLISS-behaving mean to you? What can you do to bliss-behave?

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Giving With Joy

Bill Clinton once stated, “…when we give what we can, and give it with joy, we don’t just renew the American tradition of giving, we also renew ourselves.”  I know this to be absolutely true as I continue with my Gift of Love campaign. I have been giving each work of art, the hand painted bags, to individuals with joy; and, in return, I felt renewed and uplifted. I have not been giving out these Gifts of Love for this feeling. My greatest desire is to be able to give to the world what I feel in my heart…love and kindness, which are things we all need in order to create positive changes. It is my desire model the behaviors for which I would love to see in the world. I feel so blessed and grateful to receive such positive feelings in return for each gift I have given.

Whether it is a work of art from your heart, or a donation, a gift for a special occasion, an uplifting remark, or simply a heartwarming smile, you will find when you give anything with joy, you will get a sense of warmth in your own heart. This renewal or spark can be quite addicting. I encourage you to try it.

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Who Are You Trying to Please?

Most of you intellectually know that you cannot control the feelings of others. You simply cannot make someone happy if they have decided they are not. The only ones we need to try to please is ourselves and God. When we are in joy, guess what? Your joy will infect others! You will have more positive energy and it will show! Really! In delighting ourselves, we ultimately delight others.

However, when you spend all your energy trying to please others, that positive energy wanes. You will feel tired and unappreciated when your expectations of pleasing others is not met. Why put yourself through that. Case in point, you are expecting out-of-town family, so you go out of your way to clean your home from ceiling to floor, detailing every nook and cranny. Why? Are you doing this to make yourself happy or your guests?

Nine and a half out of ten, your out-of-town guests are there to visit you, not your spick-and-span house, right? Do what makes your happy and joy-FULL. Make  your guests feel comfortable, but don’t dampen your spirits and positive energy by burdening yourself with detailing your home. That will certainly ZAP the JOY out of you; and, it would be counterintuitive. By pleasing yourself, you will please others. Do everything in love and joy. Please yourself and God.

1 Corinthians 10:31 
“So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.” (ESV)

ConTroll

CON-TROLL, each of us have dealt with it. Don’t let IT get the best of  you.

He who angers you, controls you! In fact, anyone that you allow to evoke an emotional response from you, controls you! Yeah, yeah, yeah, you intellectually know this, but emotionally you are in a stir. And, you want to know how to disengage the negative emotions. How can you address or prevent others from upsetting your balance and evoking the negative energy in you? Great question.

First, you can consider the source. Seriously look at the person who is basically talking at you because he or she are not respecting you enough to engage in a conversation. They are either looking for a reaction, or, they are passing the buck. They are venting on you, all the pent-up negative energy they had absorbed from their experiences throughout the day or longer. Who are you allowing to anger you or trigger an emotional reaction or response from you? Who is this person, really? Is that person a supervisor, a peer, a co-worker, a family member or a friend? When possible, write down absolutely everything that this person has done to upset you on a scrap piece of paper. And then release that energy by setting that scrap paper aside for at least an hour. 

Second, consider the relationship you have with this person. This is the transformational part of handling the negative emotions to create the shift of control back into your hands. How much time and/or feelings have you invested with the person who is upsetting your balance? What is your vested interest in the relationship? What is it worth to you to maintain this relationship? After you have had some to reflect on these questions, go back and revisit that paper you set aside earlier. See what you can do to transform each statement into something positive about this person. Consider how this person has affected  your life in a positive way. What qualities does this person have that you appreciate? If you look hard enough you can find at least one thing, even if he or she is simply a catalyst on your transformation to becoming more resilient. 

Think about this statement: It takes less effort to pull someone down than to pull someone up. So, how can you strengthen your resolve? How about bringing others up to your level instead of allowing them to pull you down to their energy level. In that very moment when you are engaged in a situation, where you could potentially be brought into the negative energy, can you step outside yourself and the situation such that you can gain a new perspective? Can you see the bigger picture? Is it possible to rephrase your antagonist’s words into something positive? Believe it or not, you do have a choice to either give into negative emotions or positive ones.

There are many questions you can always ask yourself such as: What is the lesson in all of this? What is the positive side in this situation? Where is the opportunity in this situation? How can I bless it and move back to a place of equilibrium? What can I laugh about this situation in my life? And, who gets to control my emotions, me or others? You picked the former, right? Of course you did, because you know that you get to choose how you want to feel. Don’t let others take away your joy. Instead, be the joy for others. Be in control (of the Con-Troll).

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Spontaneity

Spontaneity is like throwing caution into the wind and living! It is being in the moment and doing what you feel like doing! That is exactly what it felt like today! All activities today were voluntary and undetermined with no plans or set direction.

The weather was even been spontaneous as gusts of warm wind moved clouds around like a summer day (in the middle of winter); maybe it will rain or maybe it won’t rain. Ultimately it did rain.  It was a wonderful day to do whatever you felt like doing as the warmth of the sun and the carefree breezes made you feel like a kid in the middle of summer with nothing better to do than to listen to the birds and frogs sing and watch the clouds pass by.

With spontaneity and being spontaneous came joy and bliss. Everything seemed better in many ways today. There was a heightened awareness as everything seemed more colorful and inviting. Perhaps this was because there was little concern about time.

Spontaneity allows one a sense of freedom, an invitation to just be. You are at liberty when  you can engage in activities without any expectation. Aha! That’s it! With no expectation comes joy! It was letting go and simply enjoying the moment… actually enjoying the whole day. How can you invite more spontaneity into your life?

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Holiday

Holiday! What does this really mean? Broken into its two components there is HOLY and DAY, a holy day. For most a holiday surrounds a religious event like the birth of Jesus Christ with Christmas. According to Wikipedia, a Holiday is a day designated as having special significance for which individuals, a government, or a religious group have deemed that observance is warranted. It is generally an official (more common) or unofficial observance of religious, national, or cultural significance, often accompanied by celebrations or festivities. A holiday does not necessarily exclude doing normal work: the relatively minor Jewish holiday of Chanukah has been described as a “working holiday” and those who celebrate a holiday such as Diwali may have to work a normal schedule in countries where it is not a public holiday.

One can take a holiday or go on a holiday, which means taking time to go on vacation or a breakaway from one’s regular work or school schedule. Some holidays, like Christmas, coincide with vacation time like the winter break for schools and universities in the Northern Hemisphere. Thanksgiving is a holiday observed in the United States where most are off from their regularly schedule on the fourth Thursday in the month of November and that Friday following it so it creates a four-day holiday weekend for many.

Yesterday was a “holiday”… St. Valentine’s Day. How many really celebrated it? How did you celebrate it? Would it not be nice to have your own personal holiday? What would that look like? It could be a day devoted  entirely to one’s personal needs and wants. Take a moment and close your eyes; think about all your own personal needs and wants. What do they look, sound, taste, smell and feel like?

For many it could be taking an extra long shower or bubble bath using the most fragrant soaps he or she has. It could be indulging in one’s favorite meal or dessert. It could be taking time to do some arts and crafts, playing a musical instrument, singing or dancing. It can be relaxing in your favorite space, reading that novel you have put aside for summer reading. Why not pretend to have summer day right now, in this very moment. Who says you cannot experience your own personal holiday right at this moment. Take an hour or take a few minutes, and spend that time totally on yourself engaged in an activity, which totally delights every part of you. Consider having a holiday, everyday, even if it is just for a few moments to celebrate  yourself. 

Distractions

Thank goodness for distractions! What? Really? Yes. Think about it. What are distractions? Distractions are those events in our lives that redirect our attentions from the task or circumstance at hand or of the moment.

For example, when one is waiting in a long check-out line at a department store, distractions become a way to pass the time. Striking up a conversation and connecting with someone you do not know can pass the time in a productive way, because now you created an opportunity to build a meaningful relationship.

Sometimes, distractions can be a trigger of other things that also require your attention. Consider this scenario. You have to thoroughly clean your home because you are expecting guests later in the week, you have the radio playing in the background to make it fun and a song comes up that made reference to wasting away in Margaritaville . This distraction reminded you that you need to add Margarita mix and tequila to your shopping list. That would be a good distraction. 

Occasionally, distractions help us get through painful situations, physical pain or mental anguish. A good distraction from any pain is to visualize yourself either in a tranquil place or in the future looking back at the situation. For example, if you need to get a root canal, which can be a physically painful situation, it would be good to distract yourself from the possible pain you may experience by visualizing yourself in a more pleasant situation. 

Distractions also serve as a reminder to give ourselves a break. Say, for example, we are caught up in our work and have been at it for hours because of a pressing deadline. A phone call may serve as a good distraction because although it may have interrupted your flow, over time the quantity will overtake the quality of the work you produce. You will be producing large amounts of essentially mediocre work because you did not allow yourself a break to relax your mind from the task at hand.

Distractions are truly gifts from God. Distractions serve as:  a way to connect with others, a trigger to remind us of other important things in our lives, a method to direct our attention away from pain, and a reminder to take a break now and then. Distractions allow your mind to rest somewhere else for a bit. Yes, sometimes distractions can get you involved in things that are more trivial; but, why not honor that distraction.

You, your mind, body, and soul simply need a break from time to time. The key to distractions is to honor them, be deliberate and say to yourself that you needed the distraction. Genuinely utilize distractions in a positive way so your entire being can reap the benefits of the distraction. Now, did this article serve as a positive distraction for you? SUPER! Now, get back to work. Chuckle, chuckle.

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Let Go!

 

Let go of your fear! Let go of your inhibitions!

Let go of your anger! Let go of your resentment!

Let go of your anxiety! Let go of your regret!

Let go of your worries!  Let go of your woe!

Let go of your sorrow!  Then breathe in deeply.

ONLY then will there be room for joy! 

Puppies

Puppies have a way of bringing out joy in my heart! Not only are they adorable, but their whole carefree lifestyle delights me. I love the way they explore new things and territories. We can learn so much simply by watching a puppy. They eat when they are hungry, drink when they are thirsty, sleep when they are sleepy and they are always curious and willing to learn new things. They live for the moment. What could you learn from a puppy?

Laughter

LAUGHTER is all about the unexpected. It is anything that tickles your heart and soul. For example, tonight my sister and her husband decided to spend their evening at Barnes and Noble. While they where browsing the children’s books my sister had to bend down to tie her shoe. This is after she expressed to her husband how heavy and unattractive she felt…well Elmo didn’t think so as Elmo was checking out my sister’s rear end. My brother-in-law captured the image.

An unexpected, spontaneous and funny moment caused a roar of laughter. What moments in  your life can you laugh about? Laughter is good for the soul. 

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