a tickle of words to create smiles

Posts tagged ‘Violence and Abuse’

Words Have POWER!

AKO-BeGentle

In the words of Andrew Jackson, “I will speak ill of no one, and speak all the good I know of everybody.”

Andrew Jackson knew the power of words, as did many great people in our history. Currently, more and more people are aware of the power of words. October 1st kicks off National Bullying Prevention Month, in which PACER – Parent Advocacy Coalition for Educational Rights has led the way ((http://www.pacer.org/bullying/nbpm/).

I am very passionate about overcoming bullying. Bullying is no longer about the big kid stealing the little kid’s lunch money. It is so much more involved and dynamic; furthermore, with the help of technology has crept into the realm of cyberspace aka cyberbullying.

Words indeed become quite powerful. The digital age makes it so very easy. It is my hope that we can use words to bring more love and kindness into our immediate environments. Let us use our power of words to heal, not hurt. Let us serve as an example to those who do not know any better, namely our children. Spread news that is good. Share words that is helpful. Let us put into practice T-H-I-N-K:

AKO-THINKWe also need to remember to be gentle with our own selves. I know I have bullied myself at times when I am feeling upset or sad, especially when I have felt like I could have done better, looked better, be better, etc. I need to remember that I am perfectly imperfect and wonderful just as I am. I do not need to berate myself with words, when I have made a mistake. I will ultimately grow and develop from the mistake, as long as I learn from it. Each of our experiences: good or bad, success or failure, happy or sad, will help us. Reflect and learn is a positive way to use these events in our lives. Remember, words have power!

Take a Stand

I have found that when I have strong convictions for certain issues like addressing negative behaviors and bullying with respect and kindness, my life has direction, purpose and meaning. I am happy. I am not floundering around seeking what is not in my heart.

Some people, who are uncertain where they stand with life issues will vacillate, which often leads to dissatisfaction, unhappiness and disappointment. Fulfilled lives start with a strong belief and/or a passion for something, which gives you direction. Consider your own heart, your beliefs and your passions. What excites you? Let this lead your actions and you will find satisfaction and joy.

If overcoming bullying is your passion, too, then please seek me, Dr. Angi at HEARTS T HAT CARE (www.heartsthatcare.net).

Gifts of Love Update 13

Today I spent much of the day painting more Gifts of Love. I will share those images tomorrow. More importantly I had the opportunity to give “Gift of Love #9″ to a dear friend who I learned is moving. What is amazing about this is I did not know she was moving until after I gave her the gift. My heart (as inspired by God) urged me to give her one. 

The story behind this gift presentation is as follows. Earlier this week I reconnected with some friends from a church in which I was a regular member years ago. This transpired during a special service that honored the recent death of the founding reverend pastor of that church. I was close to this pastor and it was a bittersweet event. I carried a heavy heart, but he wanted us to celebrate his passing. After this special service, many of the regular members of the church wished me to return to the parish, especially one of my dearer friends.

So, my husband and I planned and went to this evening’s church service. I felt compelled to give my one dear friend a Gift of Love. She was absolutely delighted. This is what I love about her, she always values and appreciates everything and everyone! This is when I learned that she and her husband are moving at the end of this month. I am both sad and happy about this. I will miss her and her husband; but, she will be closer to her children and grandchildren. The Gift of Love was perfect! 

I also was given the opportunity to speak about my Gift of Love campaign and the importance of addressing bullying. I felt so much support from my peers at this church as we discussed the timeliness of my campaign and the importance of addressing bullying… empowering and equipping parents and children with the emotional tools they need to survive bullying.

I truly feel that I have been Divinely led tonight, which has again renewed my already profound faith in Jesus Christ. This is what I need to be doing; this is my purpose and calling. I have been chosen to be an advocate and inspiration of love and kindness as the way to address bullying and negativity to create positive changes in my community and in our world.

My friendly challenge to you is to find a way to spread love and kindness this weekend, not just to those who you feel deserve it; but, see if you can be especially nice to those who may be gruff, persnickety, prickly or even a bully. 

Determination

Determination is when inspiration, motivation and action come together. It is the fuel that feeds our passion. I am ready to do what I need to do to create a more loving and kinder world. It may be one blog at a time, one heart at a time, and one Gift of Love at a time; but, I am determined to keep going and make things happen. My heart breaks each time I learn that another person has committed suicide because he or she could no longer take the bullying! CLICK HERE  for the recent story on the seventh grade girl who recently took her life

I am determined to change that. VICTIMS no more!!! I want to create SURVIVORS of bullying. I want to create POSITIVE LEARNING and BUSINESS ENVIRONMENTS, where KIND and LOVING words and actions are COMMONLY PRACTICED and not the exception. Let me ask each of you this, when you are out and about your communities and at work, do you become absorbed in your business? Do you become so focused that you lose site that there are others around you? 

I am not saying that is bad nor am I passing judgment. I just want to make everyone aware how we can affect others in a positive way with very little effort. Encourage our youth by being role models for them. Let us unplug from our smart phones when around people whenever it is possible. Make eye contact and smile with others as much as you can. Make a point to greet others when around other people.

Try to value everyone with whom you interact at the grocery store, gasoline station, at work, at play and wherever you have an opportunity to make connections (especially when you are out and about with your children). It does not take much to make others feel valued. A little love truly goes a long way. And, children and teenagers pick up on more than we are aware as they really do watch the adults in their lives.  

How you interact with others is a visual cue to the children in your life. Our children learn what is appropriate and what is inappropriate by how you act and react with others. Take for instance how you interact in traffic situations when you are in a rush to get somewhere, are you patient or impatient with the slower traffic ahead of you? Are you on your mobile phone? 

Most likely I am blogging to the choir; but, I know I am even guilty at times of not being completely present. It is easy to get so focused in what we are doing that we ignore what is going on around us; and, in some instances this type of focus is quite appropriate. I am determined to do more and get my anti-bullying/kindness-promoting programming out into the our world. This is my passion.

You can do your part simply by taking baby steps to smile more and spread around a little more love (even if you feel it is undeserved).  Do we honestly deserve the love we have been given by Jesus Christ? Every one of us fall short, but, God is Love. And Love does not pass judgement. Let us all live a life in determination, a determination to create more positive experiences. It truly is our choice. Let’s do it! 

I will be adding more content and programs to my organization’s website, Hearts That Care, this month, so please check back often. 

Chutzpah

I want to write about determination; more specifically, chutzpah. Chutzpah is having the nerve or backbone to stand up to an issue or someone whether you are justified or not. It is that determination, passion and drive that sets you apart from others. Other words for chutzpah are: cheekiness, insolence, impertinence, impudence, crust, freshness, gall, utter nerve, shameless audacity, effrontery. The word has also been able to be interpreted as meaning the amount of spunk or ability that an individual has. In more traditional usage, chutzpah is invariably negative; but, I want to address the positiveness of having that ability to be outwardly confident and assertive. It takes a certain amount of chutzpah or spunk or assertiveness to rattle the chains of the establishment. Particularly those in regards to bullying.

There are still many out there who believe that children just need to grin and bear the brunt of teasing, but to what level. How far must they keep taking it and bone up? Those ears still hear the negative words, which will keep playing out in the mind of a child. Sure, maybe as an adult we can more easily shrug it off, but children are so eager to please and need to be praised and valued.

Through being valued, they will value others. There is already too many other negative events that children are exposed to daily. They do not need to be affronted by teasing, taunting, and name-calling. They certainly do not need to be violently assaulted with physical contact or objects. Why are children so bold as to feel it is permissible to put down others and to even assault another peer? Where are children picking up the idea that it is okay to be mean? Children are great observers. They watch adults do it. And, they watch adults turning the other way when children engage in the teasing, taunting and other forms of bullying. So, bullying behaviors become acceptable in the minds of children. Would you say that bullies have chutzpah? Eh, maybe.

I certainly feel that those who are willing to stand up to any injustices in this world do have chutzpah. It takes a certain amount of spunk to stand up to a bullying punk. When a child shows spunk, then bullies no longer have the power to affect the former victim. I would love to see everyone who cares anything about children (as well as adults) create environments where bullying is simply no longer effective. It would be rendered powerless if we provide a climate where bullying simply has no use or place. If the environment is warm, you no longer need to wear a coat. Right?

How do we create a climate where bullying is no longer “needed” or “useful”? We create learning, teaching and work environments where love and kindness are readily acceptable and recognized behaviors. In those places where love and kindness is appreciated, you will see love and kindness appreciate in value. Who doesn’t like being praised. We are all eager to please and be pleasing when the environment in which we are makes it acceptable and valued. Smiles beget smiles. Kind words begets kind words. Loving gestures beget loving gestures. All these positive behaviors are passed forward to the next person. Children WILL pick up on this and they will imitate it.

I think it takes a lot of chutzpah to get that type of campaign rolling. I am willing and ready to take the steps toward that one blog at a time; one person at a time; one smile at a time; one loving and kind gesture at a time. Each time I put myself out in my community to be helpful, caring , loving and kind, I am making our world that much better with chutzpah and determination.

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 594 other followers

%d bloggers like this: