Take a Stand

I have found that when I have strong convictions for certain issues like addressing negative behaviors and bullying with respect and kindness, my life has direction, purpose and meaning. I am happy. I am not floundering around seeking what is not in my heart.

Some people, who are uncertain where they stand with life issues will vacillate, which often leads to dissatisfaction, unhappiness and disappointment. Fulfilled lives start with a strong belief and/or a passion for something, which gives you direction. Consider your own heart, your beliefs and your passions. What excites you? Let this lead your actions and you will find satisfaction and joy.

If overcoming bullying is your passion, too, then please seek me, Dr. Angi at HEARTS T HAT CARE (www.heartsthatcare.net).

Related articles

• Anti-bullying week: Start Telling Other People (blogs.independent.co.uk)
• Anti Bullying Week 2012 – Say No to Bullying (maddsuspicions.wordpress.com)
• High School Horror: THREE Students Commit Suicide in Seven Weeks (ronskemp.wordpress.com)
• Stand Up and Stop the Madness..a Year Later… (camsgranny.wordpress.com)
• Fine Bros Get Serious, Stand Up To Bullies In Latest ‘Teens React’ (tubefilter.com)
• WATCH: Dark Anti-Bullying Video Targets Bystanders (huffingtonpost.ca)
• Students stand up to bullying (lfpress.com)

Get Involved, Use Loving Words, Be Kind…

When I see injustice, bullying, negative behaviors, I try to get involved, use loving words and behave kindly in the situation. If I don’t get involved, then I am contributing to the victimization of another sentient being. That would be UNACCEPTABLE! If I am being bullied, I will NOT allow the words to hurt me! Nor, will I lash back with unkindness. When others are unkind to me I either ignore it and pretend I did not hear it; or, I will smile, because I know the bullying behavior is the other person’s issue, not mine. Their current negative state of mind does not have to affect me. I know in my heart that they are better than that.

I have survived bullying much of my life especially in school! It has actually made be more resilient, which I contribute to my loving family. Yes, I have had thoughts in my youth of not wanting to go on in order to avoid the hurt; but, I had such a wonderful support system at home and outside of school with community theater and the performing arts, I had no time to let the hurt fester.

Yes, I wanted so much to be loved and accepted at school. I wanted a boyfriend. I felt awkward and left out at times, but I had so many extracurricular activities and academic endeavors to keep me occupied. I was involved in so much. As an adult, I see that these hurtful experiences were not unique to me. Many of my peers had similar bullying situations in their lives; furthermore, these experiences gave me insight and empathy for others.

Should we condemn bullies. No! We can only disallow the behavior of bullying. Many bullies were bullied! To end bullying, we need to create a loving and kind community, school, and environment that does not support negativity.We need to bring attention to the positive in our lives and environment.

Each of us need to be a role model and set the tone. We need to act kindly and loving to one another. We need to engage others with love and compassion whenever possible. This means, blessing drivers who cut you off in traffic, engaging every person with a smile and kindness even when we have a complaint.

Even in our own homes, when watching television especially if we have children in our households, we need to avoid negative comments; and not call a commentator, a newscaster, a political candidate anything negative aloud. Remember the walls have ears. If we cannot say something positive, constructive or helpful, we need not say anything at all.

When I am in a lower emotional state, this can be hard for me. I know the more I deliberately practice love, kindness and compassion, the easier it is for me to be love for others. I believe we all can work together to make our world more loving and positive; and, the more I stay positive, the more positive I find in the world. Let us all, get INVOLVED, use LOVING WORDS, and be KIND; I have FAITH in you! May love and kindness fill your heart at this moment and inspire you to inspire others.

 

 

Related articles

• How to Spot a Bully (doublehockeysticks.com)
• #Antibullying Day is Every Day. (jianpablico.wordpress.com)
• #110: Bullying (fittingkeys.wordpress.com)
• Workplace Bullying. (paulasponderings.wordpress.com)
• Bullying Revisited (ramblingrickblog.wordpress.com)
• Stop Bullying (paushionista.wordpress.com)
• #109: R.I.P. Amanda Todd (fittingkeys.wordpress.com)
• Don’t Be Silent! (lifeinthepatriarchalmatrix.wordpress.com)
• End bullying. Love more. (hotelgoddess.wordpress.com)
• Demi Lovato On Bullies, Beauty & ‘X Factor’: Watch Our Interview (hollywoodlife.com)

Sunshine and Smiles

Today was an amazing day. I had a great interview with Wendy Fedan of Create-A-Way on the topic of bullying. If you would like to catch the replay click here on this link: Create-A-Way Today BlogTalkRadio Wendy is a phenomenal ARTbundance Coach who utilizes her gifts in helping people create a way for their goals and dreams. I am also an ARTbundance coach with close to 20 years of experience in gifted and science education. I have inspired students to tap into their creativity to achieve their academic goals in science. I have also mentored freshman teachers. at-risk students and started anti-bullying/kindness promoting programs in which I worked.

One of my best assets has been my sincere smile. No matter how rough things could get at times, I managed to smile through it. My colleagues and students have let me know that my genuine kindness and smile inspired them; and, it often got them through the harder moments of their days. I was a ray of sunshine and hope. Actually, I believe I am still a light in people’s lives (or I certainly hope I am).

It is amazing how a simple, genuine smile can get someone through a low moment, even if it is a smile for yourself. It nurtures the heart and the soul. When you are in a low moment in your day, close your eyes and recall a memory that brought you joy. Give yourself permission to smile or even laugh if it was a memory filled with light moments and humor. Joseph Addison (a statesman, essayist and poet of the late 1600s to early 1700s) stated, “What sunshine is to flowers; smiles are to humanity.” I find this to be true.

Related articles

• Some sunshine for Sunday courtesy of Mr. A (thearmitageeffect.wordpress.com)
• The Importance of a Smile (daphnegan.wordpress.com)
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Determination

Determination is when inspiration, motivation and action come together. It is the fuel that feeds our passion. I am ready to do what I need to do to create a more loving and kinder world. It may be one blog at a time, one heart at a time, and one Gift of Love at a time; but, I am determined to keep going and make things happen. My heart breaks each time I learn that another person has committed suicide because he or she could no longer take the bullying! CLICK HERE  for the recent story on the seventh grade girl who recently took her life. 

I am determined to change that. VICTIMS no more!!! I want to create SURVIVORS of bullying. I want to create POSITIVE LEARNING and BUSINESS ENVIRONMENTS, where KIND and LOVING words and actions are COMMONLY PRACTICED and not the exception. Let me ask each of you this, when you are out and about your communities and at work, do you become absorbed in your business? Do you become so focused that you lose site that there are others around you? 

I am not saying that is bad nor am I passing judgment. I just want to make everyone aware how we can affect others in a positive way with very little effort. Encourage our youth by being role models for them. Let us unplug from our smart phones when around people whenever it is possible. Make eye contact and smile with others as much as you can. Make a point to greet others when around other people.

Try to value everyone with whom you interact at the grocery store, gasoline station, at work, at play and wherever you have an opportunity to make connections (especially when you are out and about with your children). It does not take much to make others feel valued. A little love truly goes a long way. And, children and teenagers pick up on more than we are aware as they really do watch the adults in their lives.  

How you interact with others is a visual cue to the children in your life. Our children learn what is appropriate and what is inappropriate by how you act and react with others. Take for instance how you interact in traffic situations when you are in a rush to get somewhere, are you patient or impatient with the slower traffic ahead of you? Are you on your mobile phone? 

Most likely I am blogging to the choir; but, I know I am even guilty at times of not being completely present. It is easy to get so focused in what we are doing that we ignore what is going on around us; and, in some instances this type of focus is quite appropriate. I am determined to do more and get my anti-bullying/kindness-promoting programming out into the our world. This is my passion.

You can do your part simply by taking baby steps to smile more and spread around a little more love (even if you feel it is undeserved).  Do we honestly deserve the love we have been given by Jesus Christ? Every one of us fall short, but, God is Love. And Love does not pass judgement. Let us all live a life in determination, a determination to create more positive experiences. It truly is our choice. Let’s do it! 

I will be adding more content and programs to my organization’s website, Hearts That Care, this month, so please check back often. 

Related articles

• What are the signs that my child may be bullying others online? (education.com)
• Khloe Kardashian is Frustrated Over Recent Suicide (celebs.gather.com)
• i Editor’s Letter: Bullying – it isn’t harmless (independent.co.uk)
• Anti-Learn Movement (cherishedheart.wordpress.com)
• Bullying (angelicpwrs.wordpress.com)
• Warning Signs Your Child is Being Bullied and Help (auctionshunter.wordpress.com)
• Sadness (donethisbefore.com)
• When silence isn’t golden (rakstagemom.wordpress.com)
• Bullying – A Positive Story…well as positive as it can be… (momecentric.com)
• Getting Back to Bullies (myritingboard.com)

Chutzpah

I want to write about determination; more specifically, chutzpah. Chutzpah is having the nerve or backbone to stand up to an issue or someone whether you are justified or not. It is that determination, passion and drive that sets you apart from others. Other words for chutzpah are: cheekiness, insolence, impertinence, impudence, crust, freshness, gall, utter nerve, shameless audacity, effrontery. The word has also been able to be interpreted as meaning the amount of spunk or ability that an individual has. In more traditional usage, chutzpah is invariably negative; but, I want to address the positiveness of having that ability to be outwardly confident and assertive. It takes a certain amount of chutzpah or spunk or assertiveness to rattle the chains of the establishment. Particularly those in regards to bullying.

There are still many out there who believe that children just need to grin and bear the brunt of teasing, but to what level. How far must they keep taking it and bone up? Those ears still hear the negative words, which will keep playing out in the mind of a child. Sure, maybe as an adult we can more easily shrug it off, but children are so eager to please and need to be praised and valued.

Through being valued, they will value others. There is already too many other negative events that children are exposed to daily. They do not need to be affronted by teasing, taunting, and name-calling. They certainly do not need to be violently assaulted with physical contact or objects. Why are children so bold as to feel it is permissible to put down others and to even assault another peer? Where are children picking up the idea that it is okay to be mean? Children are great observers. They watch adults do it. And, they watch adults turning the other way when children engage in the teasing, taunting and other forms of bullying. So, bullying behaviors become acceptable in the minds of children. Would you say that bullies have chutzpah? Eh, maybe.

I certainly feel that those who are willing to stand up to any injustices in this world do have chutzpah. It takes a certain amount of spunk to stand up to a bullying punk. When a child shows spunk, then bullies no longer have the power to affect the former victim. I would love to see everyone who cares anything about children (as well as adults) create environments where bullying is simply no longer effective. It would be rendered powerless if we provide a climate where bullying simply has no use or place. If the environment is warm, you no longer need to wear a coat. Right?

How do we create a climate where bullying is no longer “needed” or “useful”? We create learning, teaching and work environments where love and kindness are readily acceptable and recognized behaviors. In those places where love and kindness is appreciated, you will see love and kindness appreciate in value. Who doesn’t like being praised. We are all eager to please and be pleasing when the environment in which we are makes it acceptable and valued. Smiles beget smiles. Kind words begets kind words. Loving gestures beget loving gestures. All these positive behaviors are passed forward to the next person. Children WILL pick up on this and they will imitate it.

I think it takes a lot of chutzpah to get that type of campaign rolling. I am willing and ready to take the steps toward that one blog at a time; one person at a time; one smile at a time; one loving and kind gesture at a time. Each time I put myself out in my community to be helpful, caring , loving and kind, I am making our world that much better with chutzpah and determination.